David Kessler and Brené on Grief and Finding Meaning

If you listen to podcasts, listen to this.

If not, then start with this one.

David Kessler and Brené on Grief and Finding Meaning

I want to memorize this one.

offered to me by Abbi Hearne

General Magic

General Magic

“Business is just stories. That’s what people do. They tell stories. The ones who tell the most compelling stories make the most progress forward.” John Sculley, former Apple CEO

 

Please watch General Magic

via AppleTV

tv.apple.com/us/movie/general-magic/umc.cmc.68nmgwt1ckm4kj9yo0qlxhh3b

or

Amazon, DVD, YouTube, GooglePlay, Vudu, Hulu, SlingTV, Showtime

google.com/search?q=General+Magic

 

 

 

I’ll sleep when I’m dead

“The shorter you sleep, the shorter your lifespan. The old maxim, I’ll sleep when I’m dead, is therefore unfortunate. Adopt this mindset and you will be dead sooner and the quality of that shorter life will be worse.”

Why We Sleep: Unlocking the Power of Sleep and Dreams – 2018

by Matthew Walker, PhD (Author)

amazon.com/Why-We-Sleep-Unlocking-Dreams/dp/1501144324

How are you?

Thanks for asking.

Not sure how to answer that question.
Doing well … I think … as well as, perhaps better than …
idk

This is hard.
But most of life is.
I am still here and thankful for that.

dws.

need to write a poem

need to write a poem
about text Messages and Comments
how thoughts are lost
great and small
replaced
sometimes never seen
some misunderstood
some never delivered
how new moments are replaced by old
then both are lost
sequence vs craft
need to write a poem
nah … maybe later or tomorrow

dws.

WARNING: I am still living in Tumortown … or am I dying?

When you see me in pictures and in person I am certainly blessed and thankful, but I do still have terminal cancer. It feels strange, confusing and oh-so whiny to type that here and sometimes even more confusing than a year ago.

When I listened to a beautiful album last week, “Everything” by Darden Smith, I was transported to my in-patient rehab bed a year ago. First song is “Blessings” and whole album is truly beautiful.

This week I started chemo round 8 and Jo Ann and I will meet again with Dr B. If as anticipated, we will update each other and agree to continue this course. I and Jo Ann won’t ask how much longer I have to live because no one knows. Dr B will ask if am having any new pain and I’ll try to answer that strange question. Jo Ann will schedule two blood draws in about three weeks for Dr V.

• my sleep is frustrating
• my food is liquid … without sugar nor carbs
• mornings hard
• sentences about ’time’ are difficult
• I will read and change this update many times
• you will ask, “how are you?” and I really appreciate that question
• and I will stumble for an answer
• I will doubt this update
• I will read more of “21 Lessons for the 21st Century” by Yuval Noah Harari
• I will ride, lift, row and review parts 
• Jo Ann and I will discuss parts of Anti cancer again
• Thank you for asking each of my kids and my Jo Ann, “how are you?”. If you’re lucky and you listen; they might answer that important question. I’m pretty sure it is more difficult for them to live with Garym than for me to die with it.

dws.

“Everything” by Darden Smith, 2017

“21 Lessons for the 21st Century” by Yuval Noah Harari, 2018

“Anti cancer A New Way of Life” by David Servan-Schreiber, 2017 by Penguin

“Tumortown” by Christopher Hitchens via VanityFair

Need to write a note

shall I ride
maybe read, no ride
I’ll make a note, then ride

I should find that quote
in this small book
or listen, no read, then ride

I love to ride
fast, to, past, with, without
for health, for life

I should ride, maybe write
write about riding
where shall I

oh she just arrived home!
how was your afternoon?
“good”

write cancer trike diaries
is that quote fading?
too late to ride?

should I make a note?
the light is fading
I should ride.

 

dws.

Jul 20, 2018 – Jul 20, 2019 a strange year

Jul 20, 2018 – Jul 20, 2019 a strange year

Jul 20, 2018 we discovered Garym, a large Glioblastoma with possibly three month expected prognosis. My family and I chose ‘door number 3’, surgery, radiation and chemo with expected prognosis 12-18 month life expectancy. Surgery was July 30, 2018.

Radiologist tech after the MRI, “The Radiologist requested that I help you to come to his office after you dress.” These are not the response you expect or want after an MRI of your head. Nor are these words, “Did you drive yourself here?”

Those ten days were strange, confusing, fast, slow and very real. Family, friends and community (faith, neighbors and work) responded and I am thankful for family strength, honesty, science, art, music.

Conner accepted the task of calling family with extraordinary strength and grace.
Cassidy supported Conner that evening and continues to do so.
Jo Ann receive this news while in WI with dear friends (thank you ladies).
Abbi and Callen were working in Alaska (see Instagram).
Ben and Amelia in Oregon, in my first conversation with him, was the scientist I needed.
My siblings and parents have also responded with strength and grace.

Each of them have personal stories. Please ask them gracefully.

“Thankfulness is a soil in which pride does not easily grow.” – Michael Ramsey

I remember asking these things of my family and many friends:

– I’m never perfect, but honesty is super important in our remaining time.
– Each of us will experience this tumor differently.
– I am thankful for each of you more than I know how to express.
– I will listen to and respect each of your responses.
– Please do the same for each other and those around us.
– Please don’t let this event define your lives in negative ways.
– Stuff happens. Learn from it, grow and don’t make-up stuff.
– Ask me anything and I’ll do my best to honestly answer.
– I love you.

So far, Jul 20, 2018 – Jul 20, 2019 was included:
– slow constant physical progress (thank to Jo Ann and our kids)
– slow reading and writing progress
– one more birthday
– participation in the Rhodeland wedding!
– riding 552 miles on my Catrike since mid February
– a successful First Solo Art Show by Conner
– listening to books and poetry read by family and friends
– writing my own updates recently
– recently walking around my house without a walker
– music, music, music

Thank you, all of you, thank you,

dws.

– – – a few quotes

When I share a quote, my hope is someone will be inspired to read the poem, research or book; rather than take it like a modern meme, ’proof’ or ’sound bite’.

If you only read one book then choose “Anticancer A New Way of Life by David Servan-Schreiber”, 2017 edition

Anticancer A New Way of Life by David Servan-Schreiber
ch12 Learning to Change – William Farr (sp?) MD changed, “I’ve already lived three years beyond my colleagues prognosis. As a scientist I know that doesn’t prove anything.”

I will add, please don’t use my tumor or anyones response as proof or disproof. Our relationships are far more important than our convictions.

Relationships are most easily influenced by the negatives, and that’s why it’s so important to put effort into the positives.

“The parade for the slain police officer goes past a bakery, and the smell of fresh bread makes the mourners salivate against their will.” in poem “Note to Reality” by Tony Hoagland

“We must walk away from what we know, to find more.” ~ dws
I hope the artist in you reads this, especially if your inner artist was not encouraged.

“I just want a weather report, so I can know what jacket to put on.” – Trey

– – – quotes from Mortality by Christopher Hitchens

“Whatever view one takes of the outcome being affected by morale, it seems certain that the realm of illusion must be escaped before anything else.”

“For me, to remember friendship is to recall those conversations that it seemed a sin to break off: the ones that made the sacrifice of the following day a trivial one.”

“So far, I have decided to take whatever my disease can throw at me, and to stay combative even while taking the measure of my inevitable decline. I repeat, this is no more than what a healthy person has to do in slower motion.”

– – – a few more things

“I’m not dead yet.” ~ Monty Python

Listen to your kids. They have so much to teach you.

“Every lie haunt’s our future”. ~ Lying by Sam Harris

Now is the time for all US Voters

Now is the time for all US Voters to come to the service of their country.

I understand and appreciate that many of you have served and continue to serve your country. Whether you have served as police officers, civil servants, teachers, firefighters, or military, thank you for your service. While I have not served in these capacities myself, I have lost family and friends who have served. You have my gratitude and honor.

I’m also thankful for your service as a voter. I understand that to many of you, as you serve and put your lives on the line, it is really critical for you to work as a unit, that loyalty and the following of orders is crucial to yours and our collective safety; however, your vote is your vote, not your organization’s vote. 

Your duty this Tuesday is to represent yourself and your state, not your organization. I recognize and appreciate that some of you must consistent with your unit. 

However most of you have the power to vote according to your conscience. Please do.

dws.

i Hate Junk Robo Callers

I just tweeted the following.

#iHateJunkRoboCallers

– create a contact

– company: “a junk caller” (include quotes)

– add junk numbers to this contact

– tweet your vCard once a week

– merge others with yours

– block “a junk caller”

 

– if you know me, share your “a junk caller” contact with me via text message

– if you don’t know me, reply with a link to share your “a junk caller” contact

 

2018 May 22 : my “a junk caller” contact has 105 numbers

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1ClaLhGf5UFQszLow9kSwPiotSX5-9z1-/view?usp=sharing