need to write a poem

need to write a poem
about text Messages and Comments
how thoughts are lost
great and small
replaced
sometimes never seen
some misunderstood
some never delivered
how new moments are replaced by old
then both are lost
sequence vs craft
need to write a poem
nah … maybe later or tomorrow

dws.

WARNING: I am still living in Tumortown … or am I dying?

When you see me in pictures and in person I am certainly blessed and thankful, but I do still have terminal cancer. It feels strange, confusing and oh-so whiny to type that here and sometimes even more confusing than a year ago.

When I listened to a beautiful album last week, “Everything” by Darden Smith, I was transported to my in-patient rehab bed a year ago. First song is “Blessings” and whole album is truly beautiful.

This week I started chemo round 8 and Jo Ann and I will meet again with Dr B. If as anticipated, we will update each other and agree to continue this course. I and Jo Ann won’t ask how much longer I have to live because no one knows. Dr B will ask if am having any new pain and I’ll try to answer that strange question. Jo Ann will schedule two blood draws in about three weeks for Dr V.

• my sleep is frustrating
• my food is liquid … without sugar nor carbs
• mornings hard
• sentences about ’time’ are difficult
• I will read and change this update many times
• you will ask, “how are you?” and I really appreciate that question
• and I will stumble for an answer
• I will doubt this update
• I will read more of “21 Lessons for the 21st Century” by Yuval Noah Harari
• I will ride, lift, row and review parts 
• Jo Ann and I will discuss parts of Anti cancer again
• Thank you for asking each of my kids and my Jo Ann, “how are you?”. If you’re lucky and you listen; they might answer that important question. I’m pretty sure it is more difficult for them to live with Garym than for me to die with it.

dws.

“Everything” by Darden Smith, 2017

“21 Lessons for the 21st Century” by Yuval Noah Harari, 2018

“Anti cancer A New Way of Life” by David Servan-Schreiber, 2017 by Penguin

“Tumortown” by Christopher Hitchens via VanityFair